Tuesday, January 31, 2012

the one where someone tried to steal my dog.

The weirdest thing happened to me and Claire yesterday. We were on our usual walk through the ghetto neighborhood and I saw a guy walking towards us. I was walking by and he started reaching toward Claire as though he wanted to pet her, so I stopped so that she could say hello.

Creepy Man: "You found Lucky!"
Me: "Who?!"
Creepy Man: "My dog Lucky!"
Me: "This dog? This is Claire."
Creepy Man: "Why would you find my dog and rename her?"
Me: "This isn't your dog. This is my dog. Claire."
Creepy Man: "This is Lucky."
Me: "Umm... nope."
Creepy Man: "What have you been feeding her? She got taller."
Me: "Are you being serious right now?"

At this point, Creepy Man leaned down and grabbed Claire's collar. My adrenaline kicked in and I was ready to go all Mob Wives on him. I may be small but I'm fiesty. And NO ONE touches my Claire if I don't want them to. At that point, Claire began trying to get away from him, at which point I think he realized that she was, in fact, not his dog.

Me: "How about you let go of my dog."
Creepy Man let go and backed up. [That's right, don't mess with the Italian chick!]
I turned around and started running walking away. Very quickly.

Creepy Man: "You're sure you didn't just find this dog roaming around the neighborhood?"
Me: "I'm positive. But I'll keep an eye out for your dog."
Creepy Man: "Okay thanks. She looks just like yours."
[Really? Does she? Thanks. I think I got that.]

A few minutes later, a car pulled over to the side of the road.
Woman: "Hey, did you just find that dog?"
Me: "No, but I did find your psycho husband who tried to steal my dog from me."
[Okay. I didn't say that. But I wanted to. I really just told her that I would look for her dog while we finished our walk. But that's not nearly as exciting.]

Moral(s) of the story:
1. Don't go for walks alone in the 'hood.
2. If you are alone and see a person approaching, cross the street.
3. Carry mace around, if not for you, for the protection of your dog.

Done, done, and... done.


  1. Supercreepy, oh boy :(

    Glad he backed off.

    (how long has his dog been lost, if he's searching on foot and the chick in the car is driving around, but Claire would've been "taller" with different food?)

    1. wow, jen, i was just thinking those same things! Creepy McCreeperson to the max and the timeline/food thing don't make sense. ugh. people are gross and weird.

  2. oh really??? you can only imagine how I feel reading this post!!! Mace for both of you!!....and don't go walking at night!....xo

  3. Wow! That's insane. Maybe people should keep better track of their dogs and not accuse good dog owners of stealing them?

    We have a really shy little dog, and strange men feel the need to come and get right in her personal space. I've even been like "She's very timid. I'd rather you didn't go up to her" and they ignore me completely. What ever happened to respecting the wishes of the pet owner?

    Pepper spray sounds good (or bear spray should you get questioned) ;)

  4. Creepy! I'm not sure what I would have done in that situation, but I'm sure I'll have nightmares about it tonight! If I think of something clever, I'll come back to report...

  5. i have no idea what is wrong with people. i also don't understand how a person can possibly not know which dog is his. i don't care how identical a random desmond lookalike might be--i would know, hands down, which dog is my own. what an asshat.